I’ve never written a post directly about one person I know…and quite frankly, while I highly doubt they read my posts, if they do, and get upset by it…well, too bad.
About a month ago one of my “friends” fell off the face of the Earth. Literally.
No responses whatsoever to texts or phone calls.
So after about a week that I didn’t hear back, I started thinking: What exactly did I do wrong to cause this person to ignore me?
And I couldn’t think of a single reason…I gave this person a lot, from free things to time and friendship…but suddenly it was like I didn’t exist.
Day 8: Being that I am no longer on Facebook, it makes it a little harder to get in touch with people, but I reached out to a mutual friend, to find out if maybe she had gotten a new number or phone, and the fact that I didn’t see the obligatory Post of “Message me your numbers” meant I didn’t have contact.
They told me that the easiest way to reach her was via WhatsApp, so I re-downloaded the useless app and messaged her a simple: “I’ve been told this is the easiest way to reach you, have you been ignoring me for a specific reason?”
One of the advantages of WhatsApp is that it lets you know when your message has been read…and sure enough, my message was read later that day and not responded to.
Day 10: I write a simple: “Clearly that was a lie” (in reference to this being the easiest way to reach them).
This time I get a reply of: “Sorry super busy, Don’t have time to chat.”
Alright, I’ve had times like that…I figured I’d hear back at some later point…but nope 🙂
Day 15: I message them again, wishing them a good weekend, and also trying to figure out why I might be being ignored (as now with no responses, I’m sure they have a valid reason).
My message is simple again, even giving them an out if they wanted one: “Is this because you think I blocked you on Facebook?”
Day 20: Still no response, so I just poke them again with a: “I can’t think of one justifiable reason to ignore me…but I’m sure it’s a great one!”
Day 25: I once again try and resuscitate a friendship, that was ended for some unknown reason, and wish them a good weekend…and finally get back a response:
“Listen I need you to stop. I’m seeing someone and this can’t continue. Just please leave me be.”
Okay, let’s be clear and rewind a second…never did I express any interest to this girl that I wanted to date her.
And that response at the end makes it sound like a million times over she told me to stop and go away, and I just wouldn’t.
How about this? How about you just tell people how you actually feel? And what you actually want?
Back when you first started to ignore me, and told me that you didn’t have time to chat…would it have been hard to say then: “Look, I am dating somebody, and I can’t possibly know any other guy at the same time, so just kindly leave me alone until this either evolves or implodes.”…
I guess I just ask too much of people to be open and not just cut people unexpectedly out of their lives without an explanation.